2. Funny affirmations for self-esteem are one way you can boost your mood in just minutes! I feed my spirit. The world is missing some pizzazz. 138. I dont have everything I want, but I have all I need. I dont know, but the flag is a big plus. I honor that time. Finding humor in a difficult situation helps me win. With great power comes an even greater electricity bill. Even on my worst day, Ive still got 24 hours., 6. Some when they enter, others when they leave. Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better. Every day I become calmer and do more good for the world. 18 Funny Positive Affirmations. Sorry, I didnt pick up my phone, I got carried away dancing to the ringtone. "Your mistakes don't define you.". Loving yourself and believing in yourself is the first step in making these funny positive affirmations work for you. Consider what you want to accomplish using these witty affirmations, and go for the ones that will bring you closer to that goal. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? 225. "It's going to be hard, but hard does not mean impossible.". We are going to be best friends forever, besides you already know too much. 69. Education cost money. 102. A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours. East Happiness is a choice. Funny Wednesday Work Quotes. 1. 105. The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. An apple a day keeps anyone a way, if you throw it hard enough. Treat me like a joke and Ill leave you like its funny. Square box, round pizza, triangle slices, now thats confusing. Every weekend I do what I love most, absolutely nothing. Chris Rock Leave me a if you agree! I eat cake because its someones birthday somewhere today. I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldnt complain. 9. Every day is a gift, thats why they call it the present. 15. Dear universe, Im totally open to all of the amazing things coming my way. Helen Giangregorio. How can you not like someone who can make you laugh? To thrive in life you need three bones. It just plain forms. 21. Ive got three bones. Robert Bloch. But then again so does . 78. I experience ease and flow as I navigate my exhilarating life. Stressed spelled backward is desserts. Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math. "May your yoga pants be stretchy, your coffee be strong and your Wednesday be short.". 261. Get Love Tips Sent Straight To Your Inbox. 153. The chains on my mood swing just snapped. These funny ideas are smart and a bit sarcastic and will bring a smile to your face. Funny Affirmations. 54. 145. My dream job would be the Karma delivery service. 35. 9. [click_to_tweet tweet=I can always think of something funny to say. quote=I can always think of something funny to say. theme=style4], 2023 Oldtown Publishing LLC 479 State Route 17 N 9. I hope you enjoyed this article on funny affirmations! Pleasing everyone, thats impossible. Not everyone has good taste. 193. May your coffee be strong and your Monday productive. Bowling Alley: Please be quiet. If the funny affirmations that Ive put together dont break your cool, then feel free to throw on a comedy special on Netflix or Youtube when you feel stressed. A quote to live by for when life gets bitter. A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand. Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once. Still, you need to embrace each of these surprises with same positive conviction and appreciation. I used to have winter fat but now I have spring rolls. My past is just a bad book that deserves to be in the trash. You never run out of things that can go wrong. I dont like morning people, or mornings, or people. 221. 136. Quotes that make no sense Photo: pexels.com (modified by author) Source: UGC. Dear universe, I am totally open to all the amazing things coming my way. 228. When I was in high school I had two favorite subjects, lunch and recess. "Don't let anyone ever dull your . I am thankful for all the problems I dont have. We all need a little energy boost here and there. You might enjoy: Affirmations: 13 Answers You Should Know 6. Jun 19, 2018 - Explore Jamie Hadland's board "funny/sarcastic affirmations" on Pinterest. It is, therefore, safe to say that, sense of humor can help you become successful in whatever you choose to do in life. Then perhaps youd find value in these articles on how to write affirmations and the benefits of affirmations. Also read: 70+ Positive Affirmations For Teens From Parents. 33. 141. I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldnt complain. I am calm, patient and at peace. I am lazy till I get a motive. - Donald Trump. Why is England the wettest country? You can write them down and use them whenever youre attending a social event or if you simply just want to make yourself laugh. 70. , we dont need our internal dialogue to pile on too. This is because, in order to be funny, there are certain details that need to be perfectly delivered. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars. Socrates. Today, I acknowledge the time I have spent over the week. Dont give up on your dreams so soon, sleep longer. I didnt give you the finger, you earned it. 279. Pleasing everyone, thats impossible. 2. If you just want to keep reading, then heres some affirmations about the funny side of friendship. 165. 51. 87. Trust me, your secrets are safe with me and all of my friends. Alexa, please clean the negativity off of my mind please., 4. 105. 126. Don't forget to be awesome. I radiate calmness and tranquility, with a little side of body odor. Keep your affirmations in the present. You have to go after it with a club. Monday I shall slay thee with me mighty cup of coffee. Find a quiet place without distractions. Today, I choose to put on my positive pants. I should have theme music every time I enter a room. Albert Einstein. They log in. I love the moment when the coffee kicks in and I realize what an adorable badass I am going to be today., 12. If we shouldnt eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? Really? Think about all the things you're struggling with in your life. All rights reserved. I love my kids, which means I am doing just fine. Sometimes the M is silent. 237. You wanna know who Im in love with? 23. Stop texting me in the middle of texting you, now I have to change my text. I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle. 203. I'm sorry, I have to quickly disable alarm level brown. Its time to be much more intentional about the words that we tell ourselves and take a step back from all of lifes noise. 122. Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when Im with you. Raimonda.B. When shit hits the fan at work, I turn it into fertilizer. I am healthy, I am wealthy, I am hot!, 14. IRS: Weve got what it takes to take what you have got. So put on your favorite song, take a deep breath, and say these affirmations during your next tough time for some much-needed positivity! You definitely dont want to kill the vibe by throwing a bad joke out there! My legs are so sore from the gym that I almost couldnt walk to the donut shop. Why cry for someone when you can laugh next to someone else? Im multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time. So, here's our compilation of funny work quotes that are perfect for every workplace: Image Source: Unsplash. I dont know how to act my age because Ive never been this old before. Sometimes the M is silent. 119. Mental Style Project has been created as an outlet to guide you as you navigate through life, with the right tools and resources that will upgrade your life, enable you to take charge of your personal growth, and improve your wellness journey. Here are some tips on how to make the most of using these humorous affirmations: Laughter and affirmations are already powerful separately, so imagine what they can do for you when combined. Even on my worst day, Ive still got 24 hours. First, the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. My farts aren't nearly as bad as my dogs'. I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. 96. As long as I have best friends as weird as me, I have everything., 10. When life closes a door, just open it again. I am finding fun and joy in everything I do and everywhere I go. 203. I am lazier after accomplishing the motive. Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the journey. I dont suffer from insanity. 196. 239. A person with a great sense of humor is also more likable. 250. I often wish I was someone else Just so I could hang around with someone as awesome as me. Im so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed. You may hear crickets when you try to tell a joke. Before using these amusing affirmations, you should believe in your sense of humor. 110 Positive Funny Affirmations To Make You Smile Daily - The Random Vibez 90 Funny Affirmations To Start Your Day With Laughter (2023) 100 Short Positive Affirmations: Keep Repeating Them 47. I am not letting an episode of my life ruin the entire show. 230. I am my childs greatest comfort. Why become moody when you can shake your booty. Love your enemies. I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes. Short Positive Affirmations set the pace for your day. 22. 55. I can't make everyone happy, I'm not tequila. Putting up with others shit isnt on my To-Do list today. Affirmations can be written in a journal, spoken out loud, or visualized as a conversation between you and money. 223. Here is a list for you that has all the funny affirmations: I am making myself laugh every time I say any sarcastic word. Exercise? And in that moment I swear I still didn't give a shit. A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand. Affirmations can either be written down, spoken out loud, or visualized in the form of a conversation between money and you. 76. Please excuse me while I go check the plumbing. I havent talked to my wife in three weeks. 24. Sorry, I didnt pick up my phone, I got carried away dancing to the ringtone. 60 Short & Funny Motivational Quotes to Laugh About - Wealthy Gorilla Albert Einstein It will warm you twice unknown. But a little chocolate now and then doesnt hurt. Live life to the fullest. 1. As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools. 14. 123. I dont go crazy, I am crazy. Lifes biggest struggle: I need to pee, but I dont want to get out of bed. "It's only WednesdayHang in there!". I could agree with you, but then wed both be wrong. Im not insulting you. When I grow up to be a parent, my children will think the same about me. 72. Robert Bloch It doesnt work if it is not open. 37. Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Heres a list of important things to consider: Choosing the perfect affirmation from our list isnt much different. 5. I celebrate the highs, learn from the lows and now I release it into the past. If you see affirmations that say " I will, " " I used to, " or " I'm going to, " then this is NOT an affirmation. Funny Affirmation Quotes - ShortQuotes.cc 12. A mind is like a parachute. 154 Short, Positive Affirmations that are Easy to Remember. Your actions become your habits. Im still gonna do dumb stuff, only slower., See also: 90 Inspiring & Funny Quotes About Ageing Gracefully, 8. 41 Positive Affirmations & Positive Quotes To Treasure 192. I dont cross oceans for people who wouldnt cross puddles for me. 180. 21. Im not lazy, Im on power saving mode. 68. 3. 130. Gary Delaney, 248. Nine out of ten people love chocolate, and the 10th person is always lying.
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